When I think about all the stuff that I’ve had to deal with as a single mom I’m reminded that it’s better to pick my battles rather than get wiped out in a pointless war. There is too much going on in my life to allow nit-picky things ruin my day, my relationships, and my health. I empower myself by picking my battles carefully in all areas of my life. A few battles that readily come to mind involve the kids, the Ex, the family/friends, and the job . Here are a few ways I’ve managed that might be helpful to you.
Everyday there is something to fight about with the kids. Mine are in elementary and middle school so they pretty much have a mind of their own. There is the potential to battle over clothes, food, bath and bed time, as well as choice of friends.
The clothing battle, especially for my 12 year old daughter is a potential battle zone. She’s at the age where clothes equal popularity and the latest trends put a strain on my cash flow. Looking like Hanna Montana or the latest kid pop star is cool for her but the wacky/tacky fashions, not to mention the body hugging, parts revealing attire is enough to make me want to scream.
But I’ve learned to set a few guidelines and let her decide what she will wear. I do an quick, informal inspection before we leave the house and make firm suggestions when she wears a questionable top that will give all the little boys whiplash. She complies because she already knows the rules up front so that battle is diffused before it even gets started.
My 8 year old son is easier to handle. Just give him some jeans and a shirt and he’s good to go. There are times though when I have to remind him to put on matching socks or switch his shoes around because he still has trouble with two left feet at times.
Next time I’ll talk about battles with the ex.
Rockin’ Single Mom Sam